Dating is a hard thing to do regardless of race, gender, religious backgrounds, etc. But, if you are truly ready to have a partner in your life and are ready for marriage these are the things you need to think of and have in order before you start to look for your partner.
1. Job: Most people have a job, but if it’s not paying you what you will need to survive, do what you have to do and even if that means getting a second job to save up money. You will never regret the money saved while you move up in your work position.
2. We all have debt in some form. Whether that is student loans, credit cards, or maybe you owe family members money. Before you start to think about your partner moving in, please have these paid as much as possible and if you can have them paid off. Your partner won’t want to have that become their problem, just like you wouldn’t want to have their debt be your problem.
3. Of course depending on your age, some people can be different on this, but in my opinion I would like the man to have a home with no roommates and I honestly wouldn’t want them owning a house or condo already. Because if we were to get serious, having to sell off properties takes time and money and that money would be taken away from the home you two would want to purchase together.
4. Have your credit in check! My ex had so many defaults on his student loans I doubt he was even in the 300-400 credit score range. Now sometimes extenuating circumstances do apply, such as a disability or laid off for a time frame. But, not even paying on these, which my ex was not, makes it far worse for you in the future. It takes years to build great credit and if you are close to 30 and have defaults on student loans, not paying your taxes, or paying anything towards your credit, will mean the one who is more responsible will be in control of the finances and that will cause more fights than you two could handle. Also, if you show you do not care about your credit that shows your partner that you are not only not mature enough, but also not trustworthy.
5. Have goals set up. I mean write down 2-3 year plans and 5-10 year plans. Yes, maybe some of these won’t work out, but at least you aren’t living year to year just trying to exist and you are working towards something.
6. Lastly, compromise. Check lists for vanity reasons usually fail, but check lists for life goals usually succeed. So look for someone who has life goals and have plans similar to yours. The common denominator for the two of you will be similarities in life goals.