Update!

Hello everyone! I apologize for the long absence. I was recovering from losing my son and trying to finish my book Dating While Disabled, which I am proud to say it will be out February 14th 2017!

Here is a new interview I gave about autism and dating and about my book!

http://webtalkradio.net/internet-talk-radio/2016/12/05/a-new-spin-on-autism-answers-dating-for-autism-and-other-differentabilities/

 

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This Is Why You Should Always Have A Prenuptial Agreement

Marriage is not just about love, it is also a business arrangement.

Everyone has their own opinions on prenuptial agreements and question if they send a bad precedent before marriage. But, divorce is a possibility whether you would want to address those feelings now or not. Life has no guarantees and there is no way to know if 2 or 10 years down the road you decide the marriage is not repairable. When you get married, you never want to think about the possibility of it ending, but with the divorce rate being so high, it is something that every pre-marriage phase couples need to think about and give credence to.

If a marriage doesn’t work out, the likelihood of it being a cordial break up and everyone agreeing on every little thing, is slim to none. Sure, there are a select few who can accomplish an amicable divorce, but more often than not there is going to be some resentment and angry feelings involved, especially for the person who was dumped. They will have a major hit to their ego and instead of being logical about their feelings, they will direct their anger towards getting their exes back anyway possible. Divorce becomes revenge and anything you two had discussed before with regards to the marriage not working out, goes out the window. Every couple says in the beginning if things do not work out, I will not fight with you or I will not take this or take that. And then the gloves come off and it’s everyone for them self. Even the attorneys will get nasty and become too emotionally involved.

I have seen every end of the spectrum when it comes to divorce. You have mutual break ups, the extremely angry break ups, and the starting out mutual, only to turn into a battle until even the toothbrush is accounted for. This is why pre-nups are such a necessary asset pre-marriage. You can put everything in this legal document and no matter who breaks up with whom, the pre-nup will stand. It is very rare that a judge goes against the original pre-nup legal document.

I know some people think that this process is unromantic and that it brings down the happy celebratory vibe you two have. My response to that is, it only has that effect on your situation because you are allowing it to. All you are doing, is laying out every asset you have and making sure you are protected down the road and that your kids are protected if you choose to have them or already have them. So put the romance feelings aside, it’s just smart to have one set up regardless if you are wealthy or not. Plus have you ever entered into a financial arrangement without a contract? You probably haven’t, so why forgo a prenup when it does involve everything you own? Which ever you decide, always remember: There is a difference between marrying the love of your life and divorcing the man you thought was the love of your life.

This Is Why I Ghost

Text response is declined.

As a relationship coach, I will get a lot of flack for admitting that I ghost, but hear me out. Ghosting, is when you are speaking to someone and everything seems to be going so well and then BAM! They are never to be heard from again. You start to over-analyze every little thing you said and did the last time you talked to them or saw them. But, more often than not, the real reason they ghosted has a lot more to do with what they know of your character than them being an asshole.

I have always been very blunt and to the point, some can handle it and some cannot. But, if I stop having feelings for someone I will always slowly but surely stop responding, reason being is I have tried it both ways. I have always been upfront and honest that I like someone else or if I just do not think I am compatible with him anymore. And each time I took the awkward, but respectful way and go out of my way and tell them why I am not feeling them anymore, I would get so many obscenities sent my way.

I have been ghosted on too so it doesn’t matter who you are, you will get ghosted at least once in your life. I had one guy who said he hated ghosting and that if we were ever incompatible to please tell him. He had someone he liked ghost him and so he knew how bad it felt. He even said if she would have sent a text to me; that would have been better than silence. He and I were doing ok and everything appeared to be going well and then he just stopped responding. I even sent him a text saying, “Hey, if you met someone that is perfectly ok, just let me know” I received no response from him. So I let it go. That Friday, I am walking my dogs and guess who is outside my building with beer and trying to get into my gated community? Yep, it was the ghoster. What’s hilarious is the new girl he was dating lived in my exact building, we have 8 buildings in my complex so there’s karma for ya.

So as you can see ghosting sometimes has to occur and yes it is still immature and if the world were an expert on communication then we would never have to come up with these ridiculous terms, but with technology advancing everyday, expect ghosting to happen more and more, unfortunately it is here to stay. Just remember when you do it karma always comes back around.

Dating While Disabled

I’m happy to announce my book, Dating While Disabled will be out soon! It was slated for October 25th, but due to higher demands, I’m releasing it in June! Stay tuned for launch dates in the coming month!

Dating While Disabled will cover all of your dating needs! It will go over everything you and your partner or potential partner will need to know about dating someone with an illness!

Stay Tuned! Happy Dating!!

What a sex coach actually does.

For the past few months I have been bombarded with questions on what my job actually entails, so today I am going to explain the ins and outs of my job, pun intended.

First off, I DO NOT have sex with my clients. Nor do I use my body to show them what I am speaking about and no I do not use my hands to show them how to masturbate correctly. Now, there are sex coaches who do this and I am not knocking what they do professionally, but I never wanted to be that type of sex coach. Later this year I will be taking classes to be a certified clinical sexologist which covers a wide range of topics, such as: psychology, sex abuse, sexual dysfunctions, legal and unethical practices, etc. I also will be getting my sex educator certificate. As you can see there are a wide variety of topics when it comes to sex. And sex is the only thing in this country or even abroad that isn’t taught, your ideas of what a woman or man likes all comes from secondhand knowledge, which can be from past sex partners, friends, or even family.

I wanted to change how the topic of sex is viewed and for sex to become less awkward for parents and their kids/teens to bring sex up without skirting over the major points that need to be talked about. With so many sexually transmitted diseases and incorrect information on protection, it is necessary to discuss it at length, regardless of the persons comfort levels. The percentage rates of HPV, Herpes, and other highly contracted STD’s could go down with the correct information and training being shared to the public. Young adults and even most adults think they are invincible and will not contract a STD, but it’s that ignorance that causes the statistics to skyrocket.

So no matter what you may think of my job, please be safe. If not for yourself, do it for your partner. They shouldn’t have to deal with a lifelong decision that you made without their knowledge or consent just because you think you are superman or superwoman for those 30 seconds or 30 minutes. Happy Dating and remember to WRAP IT UP!!

Secrets To Drama-Free Love Was Published Today!

Hello everyone! I am happy to say that my first book that I cowrote, Secrets To Drama-Free Love was published today and is available on Amazon.com. My chapter in the book is titled, The Secret To Not Allowing Life Events Define Who You Are And Where You Are Going. In my chapter I discuss how I dealt with the many people in my life who thought because I look completely normal and healthy, that I was lying about my illness or that I was exaggerating the extent of my illness.

So many people have something in their lives that they wish they can change, but since we are not capable to turn the clocks back to make that change, we need to learn how to accept our past decisions, our failures, our white lies, or anything else that affected our lives in a negative way due to our past decisions. Since we can not change these past events, I will show you how to move forward and get everything you wanted. Everyone is given a purpose and it is up to you to figure out what that purpose is for you and to implement it. It doesn’t matter how far behind you are, due to life moving forward with or without you. Even if your personal timeline isn’t achieved, you will still be happy and you will not care that it took you longer than you preferred. You especially will not care about that timeframe, especially once your goal is accomplished.

 

http://www.amazon.com/Secrets-Drama-Free-Love-Lorii-Abela/dp/0997260130/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1457702658&sr=8-1&keywords=christy+goldstein

Secrets To Drama Free Love

In preparation to the launch of the next book in the Sexy Secrets to a Juicy Love Life, here is the Youtube video explaining my chapter and why I wanted to help others with their relationships with healthy people and their illness. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=T9RZd4oEMbo

Officially a relationship, life, and professional coach!

The past couple of months I was studying like crazy to get my coaching certificates needed to further my career as a writer and dating expert. I completed the certified professional coach, certified relationship coach, and certified life coach. I received an 98% so I am a really happy girl, that I was able to get this accomplished, especially since I had just had a neck surgery. I am striving for people to become more educated on invisible illnesses and how it affects the people who have them. I am one of those people and I knew the only way I could help deal with this illness was to write about it and to hopefully help someone along the way.

I am still attending The Ohio State University and currently writing two books. One is on dating and love, and the other is a non-fiction book about my journey with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome and my surgeries.

Look out for more things I am trying to put together to help my fellow EDSers and disability people across the world.